Are our friends too clingy?

One thing I've had a few emails about recently is how friendships are affected when relationships with other people come into the picture.
I've had a few emails off people asking for advice and what to do when they feel their friendships are slowly changing as their friends or even themselves have become involved in a relationship.
These kinds of situations happen to everyone at least once, and more often than not the situations can get a little messy.

'Hi Rebbie,
Me and my friend have been best friends all the way through school, but recently, she's started seeing this guy. We all like him, and he's great fun to be around. But we never see her any more. Everyone in our group of friends try to invite her out when we do stuff and hang out, but she never comes out, and spends all of her time with him. This has been going on for a few weeks now, and one of our friends tried talking to her, and asked if we were all still friends to her, and why she hadn't seen us any more, and she just got really angry. Her boyfriend isn't helping either, we all got along with him great, but now he thinks we're all jealous of them cuz none of us are in relationships and we're just being clingy. I don't know what we can do, because everytime we try to talk to her about it, she just gets angry.'

Unfortunately these kinds of things do happen to everyone, I was just sat with my friend not so long ago today, and she was explaining to me how her and her friends haven't seen one of their friends since she got with her girlfiriend, it's an all too common situation and unfortunately it messes with friendships that are years old.
The best thing I feel you can do now, is not to pressure them into seeing you. I've made that mistake before, it's natural for us to want to fight for our friendships, but as you've said your friend isn't having any of it. If the  reaction to you and your friends wanting to spend time with this girl, and wondering why she isn't seeing you anymore, then there really is no point in pushing her any further. It will only result in more arguments and your friendships being destroyed completely by the arguments.
As for the boyfriend saying that you guys are all jealous, regardless of whether you guys are or not, it isn't the approach he should be taking towards the situation. It's only going to cause more bitterness between you and your friend, because your friend will then believe you can't be happier for her, which from what you said really isn't the case. Her boyfriend should understand that you've had a relationship with your friend all the way through school, and therefore it's an important relationship in his girlfriends life. Surely he'd want his girlfriend to have her friends around her? Even if he didn't personally like you guys, his girlfriend clearly liked you guys enough to spend however many years close with you guys and at the end of the day, that is what matters.
I'd always try and convince my boyfriend to not argue with his friends, friends are one of the most important things in life, what is life without friends? It seems very inconsiderate to influence and push someone's friendships into breaking even more...
Either way, by the sounds of it, there isn't really anything you can do to improve the situation. Your friend doesn't seem too interested for the moment to keep things the way they were, and is really defensive when you do try. My advice would be to prevent any more arguments is to, not bring up the situation and ask about it because it's clearly leading to negative reactions.

Take it as a friendship drifting away, which I know isn't the outcome that you want, but from what you've told me and my experiences with me and my friends that have gone through this, is that unless things change drastically or that they break up, I don't feel you'll be spending time with your friend like you used to. Unfortunately some people lose sight in the importance of friends when they're in a relationship. I've known many people to go down that path, and there'll always be people who do.
They don't always realise what they're doing, and it's a massive shame to let a friendship go. But what you and your friends need to decide now, and where you'll stand with this friend of yours, if anything happened and your friend came running back to you guys, would you be there for her as a friend? Or would you take the 'we're not going to be around only when it suits you approach?' Do you really want to be friends with someone who would ditch you when a new partner comes into the picture? But do you really want to let go of this friend?

What I thought was interesting, was that the boyfriend said you guys were 'too clingy' and it got me wondering, are us friends too clingy when our friends take on other priorities in their lives? Are we expecting too much to want to keep the same friendships when new relationships come into the picture. Trying to see it from the other perspective, where should the line be drawn between, seeing friends, seeing partners, work/school, family etc.

What is more important to you? Friends, Family, Relationships, work, or trying to keep the balance between  them all. Personally I like the balance I have now, I spend a lot of time with friends, my brother, and when I can, my boyfriend, and still have time to get on with work, write this blog, and have time for myself.
But not everyone is the same as me, people prioritise things differently, and this is what I want to hear from you guys.
What do you prioritise? And do you feel friends can be clingy when it comes to keeping hold of friendships? If so, where's the line for you? Everyone's different and it's all a matter of opinion, I'm just curious too see what you guys think...

So either comment below, Follow me on twitter or facebook (Links above) or email me at Shaneyxcakes@gmail.com